discover your purpose

Reason for living, boundaries, communication,  success, negative mind thoughts, stress, love

Finding and developing your purpose gives meaning and excitement to life. This is why you were born. Living the life you are meant to live.

You begin by looking at yourself. The more you understand who you are, the easier it is to realize your reason for living. Your purpose must make you happy and energized.


“The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers.” -- M. Scott Peck

CONSIDER YOUR PERSONALITY. You are different from others. Your personality decides how you behave and how you see life. see DISC Personalities Overview. Look carefully at your personality traits. Most people have two personality traits. One is usually more dominate than the other, but each one will take over given the situation. They will tell you more about your purpose in life than any other clue. Example: I am an I – Influential person. I enjoy excitement, parties and meetings, change and people who are energizing. I am uncomfortable with negative thinking and being embarrassed, especially in public.

CONSIDER YOUR VALUES. Values are your personal philosophy; what you believe in, feel and think about yourself and your life. Think about things that are rewarding to you. These may differ from needs. A need is a necessity. A value is something that completes you. When you go against your values, you diminish your self.  You damage your integrity.

Make a list of the things you value most. A partial list might include: Peace of mind, security, fun, flexibility, a close relationship with your family, respect from others, power,or a close relationship with God.  Personal possessions - a car or house are more in the area of needs. You want them and strive for them, but you can live without them. Example: I value a loving relationship with my family, appreciation and attention from others.

CONSIDER YOUR NEEDS. See Life is a Banquet. Example: I need horses in my life and I need a job I enjoy.

CONSIDER YOUR STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES. Example: I am good at understanding horses. I am bad at saying, “No,” to people.

CONSIDER WHETHER YOU ARE EXTERNALLY OR INTERNALLY MOTIVATED. If you are externally motivated, you expect others to take care of you. You feel you have no control over your life. Things happen because of other people or circumstances. Example: I know that life is predetermined and I can't change it. Besides, if something bad can happen, it will.

If you are internally motivated you take responsibility for yourself and your actions. You are not a victim. You do not wait for something to happen. You make things happen. Example: I don’t expect others to take care of me. I take care of others.


"Every person is the creation of himself, the image   of his own thinking and believing.  As individuals think and believe, so they are." -- Claude M. Bristol 

Think about:

  1. Who you are, your abilities, knowledge, insights, and      experiences.
  2. What you are good at. Example: I am good at creating art that shows excitement.
  3. What your learned skills are. Example: I am good at drawing perspective.
  4. How you do things. Do you analyze, talk, listen, solve problems, care for others, give hugs, etc.? 
  5. How you like to spend your time. This defines who you are. Do you do things to help other people, write books or improve yourself? 
  6. What subjects you watch on TV or videos or read about. What      conversations interest you most? What topics get you most excited and passionate? 
  7. What kind of life you want. Do you want it to continue the way it has? If not, what changes do you want to make?
  8. What kind of person you want to be. Do you like yourself as you are now? Are there any improvements you want to make?
  9. Where or when you are most insightful. You just naturally do __________________.
  10. What experiences contribute to your life’s purpose. Example: I have had to work hard and make many changes to continue with my art.

I am ________________, I do this by__________________.
Example: I am an artist, I do this by using my creativity and color skills.

purpose in life, understand myself, motivation, talents, abilities, skills, mission in life, goal,

 Look at all the information you have collected abou t yourself. What patterns do you see? What areas are most exciting to you? This is the direction to pursue. 

Example: You realize that you enjoy teaching. This doesn’t mean that you will become a fifth grade teacher. You might teach evening workshops. You could begin teaching at work. You might write articles that are instructional.

Think about why you like teaching. Do you like the interaction with others or seeing someone benefit from your knowledge? The better you answer "why" to your choice, the more options you have to look into.

Now take the information and begin to move in that direction. This is trial and error. You constantly refine your purpose until it suits you completely.

Once you have defined your purpose, see yourself doing what you desire. Start collecting pictures of people doing what you want to do, being who you want to be. You don't have to spend a lot of time with these pictures but once you have a visual interpretation of them, it's easier to recognize your purpose when you see it in real life. Create a scrapbook of your pictures.

“Many men go fishing all their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are really after.”   -- Henry   David Thoreau 

The next step is to create and implement goals to help you accomplish your purpose.  See Goals  Basics and Example.

© LifeSkills International 2014

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